Fifty-third bowl of soup (5)

"The conditions here are so harsh, it's no match for the palace, and you may be wronged by the princess."

The princess was a little shy: "It's okay." As long as you can see Xie Ze, you can just ask her to skip meals.

Lu Ling spontaneously went over to help. The princess wanted to intervene, but she did nothing to help. In the end, she had to sit on the threshold and watch the two big men working there. Xie Ze doesn’t have many ingredients, and the meals he makes are very simple. The princess is used to eating the delicacies of the mountains and the sea. The first time she ate such rough meals, she naturally couldn’t adapt, but she still forced herself to swallow and raise her head Look, Lu Ling has gone to the house to clean up. She must live here at night, and Xie Ze is standing not far in front of her.

She couldn't eat a bit after eating. The taste was generally the same thing. More importantly, she looked at Xie Ze's figure and suddenly lost her appetite. Coming all the way to this small town, she was spoiled, and she had suffered a lot, but if Xie Ze could give her a little gentleness, even just a little - she wouldn't be so sad.

He always rejects people thousands of miles away, does not please her, does not flatter her, and at the same time, does not like her.

The princess doesn't understand why this is, what's wrong with her? Everyone squeezed their heads and wanted to be a servant, but this Xie Ze regarded her as a scourge, and even wanted to run when she saw her, let alone get along with her.

Lu Ling cleaned up the house, and the princess slept inside at night, and then he went out to arrange dinner for the other soldiers, and slept outside, making it easy to make a living. Fortunately, there are not many people coming, more than 20 people, otherwise it would be difficult to arrange.

At night the princess slept in the room, Xie Ze was not there. The princess was lying in this dilapidated mud room, feeling uncomfortable. How could it be compared with her palace, it was dark and broken, and the walls were mottled. It was really scary to sleep alone in the room. She thought for a while, and said to Lu Ling who was guarding her outside: "Go and call the general to this princess."

Lu Ling hesitated: "Princess, it stands to reason that it should be the night watch of his subordinates."

The princess tantrums stubbornly: "If you ask you to go, you can go, where there is so much nonsense!"

Lu Ling had no choice but to walk outside from the window. Near the door, Xie Ze sat there leaning on the door panel. The soldiers outside were already asleep, except for his black eyes that looked particularly fascinating in the night. "General, princess... please come over."

Xie Ze frowned slightly: "I see, sit down and take a break."

"Yes."

Xie Ze walked to the window a few steps, and said in a deep voice, "Princess, it's the end."

"Do you think I'm so bad? I'm so impersonal, so spooky, and not easy to get along with?"

This unreasonable questioning made someone else be sincere and frightened, but Xie Ze looked coldly: "The princess is a princess, and she has a stubborn and willful capital."

The princess bit her lower lip and lay on the bed looking at the roof. She didn't even have a tent, and mud and sand fell on her from time to time. Knowing that she was going to sleep in his bed, Xie Ze took away all her personal belongings. He also ordered people to go to town to buy new sheets and bedding. Anyway, he didn't have any closer contact with her. Think about it and like him for several years, but until now, let alone holding hands, even Xie Ze's personal belongings, the princess has not come across.

She sniffed and explained: "...I just wanted to give you a breath today, not deliberately oppressing the people."

Xie Ze squinted his eyes and looked up at the sky. The dark night was dotted with stars. He did not speak and did not give any response.

The princess felt that she was particularly wronged. She is the dear daughter of the sky. For such a thank you, she is considered honorable. But this person is so cold from beginning to end. How much love can she give him? "...That sweet-scented osmanthus, greedy, with my dictum, she can live a good life in Sima's house in the future, and she will definitely mess up the Sima's house by then. But after waiting for a long time, those two people Realizing that I won't care about this anymore, Osmanthus will suffer. Although these three people are not very good, they are not bad guys. Are you angry that I didn't cut their heads?"

"At the end, the general is not the one who hassled life."

The princess is even more sad. She felt that she had given enough, and even made a decision for his careful consideration, but this person is always so cold and remote. "Xie Ze, you are a bastard."

Xie Ze was silent.

She was obviously crying: "Do you think I have to like you? This princess tells you that people who want to be a horseman can go around the capital ten times!"

Xie Ze thin lips and lightly said: "Then I wish the princess will find a happy man soon."

"Xie Ze!" The princess sat up from the bed so angry that she could just see the tall figure standing in front of the window. The shadow of this man was reflected on the ground by the moonlight, and she had imagined more than once what it would be like to be hugged by him, but no matter how hot her heart is, it will cool down one day. "Can you tell me why? Why don’t you like me? What’s wrong with me? I like you so so much. I even asked my father not to grant marriage, and asked him to respect your opinion. In order to do this, why did you Still refuse to like me?"

As she expected, Xie Ze did not respond to her. In fact, if it weren't for him to be a courtier, the princess believed that this person would never have looked at herself. The superior conditions she was proud of could not be dealt with in front of Xie Ze, because he simply couldn't appreciate it. "My likes are also limited. This princess is a member of the royal family and won't be so humble forever to wait for you to look back at me. So Xie Ze, I just ask you: Can I have a moment for me?"

Xie Ze's answer was simple and firm: "Never."

She hugged the quilt and cried like a child.

In fact, Xie Ze didn't understand why he refused to marry the princess, and no one had asked him to guard his life. But he really didn't have the idea of ​​starting a family. He couldn't help keeping a distance from every woman who tried to approach him. Even in the middle of the night, he couldn't help but think of another woman.

"I do not understand……"

"The princess does not need to understand." Xie Ze whispered. "I have someone in my heart."

The princess cried harder: "Who is it?" She promised not to kill her!

Xie Ze said lightly: "Nothing."

What does "..." mean? She burst into tears and couldn't understand what he said.

Xie Ze repeated it again, not knowing whether it was with the princess, or telling himself again: "No. I lost her."

After speaking, he turned and left, leaving the princess alone in a trance.

Lu Ling saw Xie Ze coming back, and quickly got up to go to the night watch, but was stopped by Xie Ze: "Lu Ling."

"General."

"Do you... know what likes are?"

Lu Ling was taken aback when asked. "Why does the general ask this?"

"What does the princess like about me?" He muttered to himself, he didn't understand the question.

Lu Ling couldn't help laughing: "The general is young and promising, he is upright, and he is the princess's lifesaver. Isn't it normal that the princess will like the general?"

"Then why... I don't feel like her." Xie Ze frowned. "There was a girl who liked me before. I treat her differently from the princess."

"It's not easy, the general naturally likes that girl."

Xie Ze listened, as if struck by lightning. "what did you say?"

Lu Ling lowered his head and still smiled: "That's how you like someone. If you get deep into your bones, you will see someone better and more beautiful than her again, and you will definitely not be tempted."

"Listen to what you mean, have you liked others?"

Lu Ling was a little embarrassed: "Yes, I also have someone I like."

"That person...?" Xie Ze had rare curiosity. Lu Ling had been by his side for several years, but he had never heard him talk about it.

"The subordinate is not easy to say, but that person, the subordinate is willing to make any sacrifices."

Xie Ze waved his hand, and Lu Ling went to watch the night again at the window, leaving him alone in front of the door.

The wind is gentle, and the moonlight is not bad. In short, it was a good night, but Xie Ze received a big shock in his heart. To be honest, he always knew that the princess liked him, and while clearly rejecting her, he never thought of anything else, but tonight, he couldn't help thinking, why did he reject the princess?

Xie San wanted to live a good life again before his death, and wanted to marry a daughter-in-law and go home. Don't men think so? Then why would he not? The princess likes him, and even the emperor takes him seriously. It stands to reason that he should nod his head to be a prince and enjoy his wealth and glory. Is he afraid of a bad life in this life?

But in the end, he just wanted to be alone and not to be accompanied by anyone.

...He never even thought about getting a wife.

why?

Looking up, Xie Ze saw Lu Ling standing upright in front of the window. He still remembered Lu Ling's tone when talking about the person he liked. Although it was dark, he could still see the gentle light in Lu Ling's eyes. It is not regretting, persevering, and not hesitating.

That kind of love is already love.

Xie Ze felt that his mind was chaotic, and there was something he wanted to know, but he didn't want to let it come out. He has a hunch, if he sees his heart clearly, he will definitely change.

In that case, with care, how can you return to your own world with nothing? Even if he can't remember what happened, Xie Ze's soul can't forget the torture of the river bottom for thousands of years. Did he climb ashore after suffering all the pain? Was it because he fell short of his success?

No one can hinder his footsteps, he wants to go back to that world, find his past, and seek justice.

Has the world ever treated him kindly? He worked so hard, and finally ended up in a tragic end? Xie Ze covered his chest, and he felt that something in that place gradually became vivid and moving.

But in the end he closed it.