Kunning

Chapter 180: ask freedom

The calmer it is, the more thrilling it is.

The noisy cicadas are hidden in the shadows of the trees, but it highlights the palpitating silence at this moment.

Jiang Xuening didn't seem to be able to hear anything, even the chirping of cicadas outside the nearby door and window seemed to be far away in the sky, only her own rapid heartbeat, and the pulse that came through the palm of her wrist , so clear, so chilling!

The wall reading hall is not as good as the Qinqin hall.

Usually there are servants serving in the Qinqin hall, but in the Bidu hall, no one dares to take a step closer. At this moment, there is no one else at the door except the two of them.

Jiang Xuening had also thought about it in the past, what exactly does Xie Wei think of himself?

Hate it, don't you like it?

No matter what, I never thought about this time today. That was something she wouldn't think about, and she didn't dare to think about it, and it was also a possibility she had ruled out from the very beginning!

But Xie Wei broke all of this.

In her previous life, she was really not a little girl who was inexperienced and unaware of people's hearts.

If Xie Wei was not so special, she might not have noticed it until today.

Jiang Xuening clenched her fingers as hard as she could to control herself.

The palm that gripped her wrist tightly did not intend to relax.

Xie Wei seemed to have done nothing out of the ordinary, and was still so indifferent, looking at her with blindfolded eyes, and said, "Is there anything wrong with staying in the capital?"

She is shaking.

Xie Wei didn't seem to notice it, and said in a calm voice: "The family doesn't dare to provoke you easily, outside there is Xiao Dingfei to accompany you to mess around, and even married off the elder sister you usually don't like. In the future, Yan Lin will return to the capital I should be glad to see you here. The princess went to Tatar to get married. The news is the fastest in the court, and you will know it as soon as you are in the capital. But you can't stand the life at home. It's the same when you go home and go to school, no one can criticize you. Why do you have to go?"

Not a single word of coercion or coercion.

Even when he said these words, there was still a vast distance with high mountains and thick fog between his brows and eyes, without any selfishness, as if he was thinking about her.

But it is like a meticulous net!

Every time Xie Juan uttered a word, Jiang Xuening felt that the big net tightened towards her! Bit by bit, the space where she stood and the air she breathed made it difficult for her to struggle, almost suffocating!

She tried her best to maintain her composure, not daring to provoke him, and said: "Mr. thinks highly of the students. The students used to be indulgent. If it wasn't for the help of the sir, I'm afraid it would have caused a catastrophe."

Xie Wei said: "Then why not continue indulging in sex?"

Jiang Xuening tried to pull back her hand, but the hand holding her didn't move at all.

Xie Wei looked at her, and narrated very calmly: "You are the daughter of the minister of the household department, the companion of the eldest princess, the wife and sister of the king of Linzi, the playmate of Yan Lin, the backer of Xiao Dingfei, my student—are you afraid? What?"

Every word he said hit her sensitive nerves, and when the words "my student" came out, the tense nerve in Jiang Xuening's mind finally broke with a "buzz"!

Anyone in the world can—

Only Xie Wei is definitely not the one who dares to contaminate her!

At this moment, she is like a prey that has been forced into a dead end. Facing the approaching beasts, she has to open every sharp thorn in her body and tighten every corner of her body in order to bulge up her little body. With courage, he opened his reddish eyes wide and said to him: "Let me go."

She didn't call "Sir" any more.

The traces of hostility in Xie Wei's eyes finally rose quietly, but his voice was softer than before: "Isn't Zhang Zhe still there? Why do you want to leave the capital?"

If this name was mentioned in the past, Jiang Xuening might feel a little inhuman sweetness in her heart, but after talking about it the day before yesterday, all that this name can bring her is irreparable regret and unattainable pain !

Xie Wei stepped on her sore foot.

She began to struggle hard, stared at him, gritted her teeth and said sharply: "What does it have to do with him! What a bad person I am, what a bad heart, didn't my husband know it all earlier? A girl in the countryside How can I be on the Hall of Elegance! The capital is not the place I should be, every day here is like lying in a frying pan, I can't live a day in peace, I can never be at ease! Why can't I leave?"

Every day is like lying in a frying pan, never having a day of peace, never being at ease.

Xie Wei rolled his eyelashes and stared at her.

But he felt that her desperate attitude was very ridiculous, and even disappointed him. There was a kind of icy bitterness in her calm tone: "It's only a coward who thinks like this. Ning Er, you are not a child anymore, stop messing around."

Jiang Xuening reached out to break his hand.

He didn't move, he just felt that she was so hysterical, avoided him like a snake and scorpion, and regarded him like a scourge, but he didn't know why she was so afraid of him...

At that moment, there was a bit of sadness.

He finally lowered his voice and said softly: "Ning Er, stay here."

Tears welled up in Jiang Xuening's eyes: "Let me go!"

Xie Wei seemed to have never heard of it: "Princess went to make a wedding, I didn't do what I promised you, and I still have to pay you back, and I owe you my life."

Jiang Xuening couldn't break free from him, choked up and said: "I don't want you to pay it back, I don't care about it!"

Xie Wei thought of a long time ago, the little girl who clearly hated him, shed tears all day long when she saw him so ill. Staying by his side is afraid that he will die next to her and live with a dead person; if you want to go out to collect medicine, you are afraid of mandrills in the wild and wolves that walk at night.

That day was heavy snow in the solar terms.

It is getting colder in the deep mountains, and white snow is falling on the high places.

The little girl was tired from crying all night.

He woke up in a daze, but there was no one in the morning.

It wasn't until noon that I saw a group of white shadows walking in from outside the cave. She was covered in cold air, her head and shoulders were covered with snow, her lips were bruised, she picked herbs from nowhere, and she struck flint with trembling hands. But the branches were all soaked this day, she couldn't light it, but she didn't cry, she just crushed the herbs bit by bit, and put them into the broken bowl she picked up from some grave.

His knife stuck in a crevice in the stone.

It took her a long time to pull it out, and scratched her wrist tremblingly, the bright red blood trickled out, meandering into the broken pottery bowl at the corner, mixed with the dark green medicinal herbs, and became A thick ink purple.

Then he brought the bowl to his lips.

The young girl Bai Shengsheng's face was bloodless, and she coaxed him with a crying voice: "Zhuangzi came up with a very powerful doctor, and he used this prescription to save the dead. Just drink the medicine and it will be fine..."

How can the dead be saved?

Most of them are bluffing tricksters.

He still can't tell whether it is his dream or not.

Only the extremely astringent herbs mixed with the rust-like bitter taste of blood flowed out from the depths of memory from time to time.

Then he burned it, and it seemed to be fine.

The little girl became confused.

He went out to explore the way and find some food, but she always tugged at his sleeves, she was unconscious, but she still complained dreamily: "I knew it, you have to go by yourself when you're done..."

As a last resort, he softened his heart and walked behind her back with one foot deep and one foot shallow.

But she still felt that he was not a good person and would leave her behind.

He had no choice but to tear off a narrow strip of the already dirty robe, tie one end to her wrist and the other end to his own wrist, and then told her: "Now I am tied to you, and no one can go first." ,I am here."

Her sleep talking slowly stopped.

Xie Wei recalled that it was really the craziest and most stupid time in his more than twenty years.

There seems to be such a belief in the dark—

I believe that in such a desperate situation, there is still a glimmer of life to be found. There are no qin and books, no knives and swords, no heavenly religion, no imperial court, no life experience, and no revenge, only the mighty world, and two people who want to live.

But Jiang Xuening said that she didn't care if he didn't want to pay it back.

There is hatred hidden in the coldness, like how many times I met her face to face later in the capital?

Xie Wei felt a sharp pain in his chest.

The pain came so quickly and so strangely, that before he could distinguish it, he felt dizzy and dazed for a while, and said: "It doesn't matter if you don't want it, there are everything in the capital..."

Jiang Xuening had been pushed to the brink of collapse, and shouted at him fiercely: "I have everything, except freedom!"

Xie Wei said, "Why don't you understand?"

Jiang Xuening said: "Let go!"

Xie Wei said to her word by word: "There is no real freedom in the world. Even if you escape to the ends of the earth, as long as you have a bond in your heart, you will be trapped in a cage forever! You will have to come back after all..."

Mostly all the truths in the world are too cruel, wrapped in layers of sharp thorns, not only can't penetrate the ears of people, but will pierce the listener's defenses and protect themselves tightly inside.

Not only did that fear not diminish, but it even surged.

Jiang Xuening didn't know whether she was more afraid of Xie Wei, or his words, and finally couldn't bear it anymore, unable to break the palm that was holding her, she buried her head and bit down deeply.

Severe pain came from the back of the hand, almost penetrating into the bone marrow, but Xie Wei was still unwilling to let go, looking at her, there was even a hint of pleading in his voice, almost paranoid: "Jiang Xuening, don't go."

The pain was excruciating, and the fingers spasmed.

In the end, Jiang Xuening broke free from him, her chest heaved, her eyes widened angrily, and she stepped back, as if to refute him, but also as if she wanted to tell herself: "Nonsense! It's all nonsense!"

She didn't have time to clear up any emotions, and she didn't want to think too deeply.

And so escaped.

run away.

That night, she took the carriage prepared by the mansion, took her luggage, and left the capital. The mountains and rivers were far away, and she went to the middle of Sichuan for three thousand miles.

Xie Wei's hands were empty, and blood dripped from the back of his hands along the position close to the tiger's mouth, dripping heart-piercingly.

After all, he stood inside the door and didn't take a step after him.

That low threshold, like a chasm, tore him apart from the outside world, no one could cross it, others couldn't get in, and he couldn't get out.

When Lu Xian came to Bidutang, it was dusk.

Jianshu stood outside and dared not go in.

He looked inside along the door, and saw that it was dark inside. The piano that Jiang Xuening took from the Youhuang Pavilion earlier was lying on the ground, with a broken pillar, and the broken string curled up like a black silk. And Xie Wei stood in front of the wall in the shadow, without moving for a long time, withered like a rotten tree. A small branch of green apricot was placed on the window sill, and the crimson light of the setting sun penetrated from the back of the green leaf. The immature fruit was embedded on the edge of the branch, and it was unknown who broke it.

Jiang Xuening should have been here.

Seeing this scene, Lu Xian didn't dare to step inside.

On the other hand, Xie Wei turned his head slowly and saw them, as if nothing happened, there was no abnormality on his face, and said: "You came just in time, just in time for the discussion, let's go together."

Lu Xian saw his hand.

Xie Wei walked past the broken piano and headed towards the Qinqin hall, thinking that everyone must have waited for a long time.

Lu Xian and Jian Shu were still standing in place.

Jianshu was at a loss and didn't understand: "Why not force it to stay?"

Lu Xian looked back at the broken piano.

Silent for a long time, he stopped laughing rarely, and said slowly: "Xie Ju'an is not that kind of person."