Lovely Allergen
Chapter 54: Straw and knife
Song Yu still didn't hold back. When he embraced Lezhi, he restrained and only used very light strength to make this hug look more like comfort than possession.
"No." Song Yu stroked the back of Le Zhishi's neck, her voice a little dumb, "Nothing like this will happen again." Song Yu is smart enough, but he doesn't know how to make Le Zhishi. Understand that he actually cares about him very much, but actually doesn't want to leave him at all. His feelings are like the tip of an iceberg, and only one ten thousandth can be revealed to Lezhishi, so that he can get close enough to the normal performance of a brother.
But now it is becoming more and more difficult for him to balance his emotional output. He wants Lezhishi to know his own importance, but he is unwilling to expose his true desires to him. He satisfies himself by relying on Lezhishi's trust and dependence on him. Narrow possessiveness.
"What I promised you, I will do it."
Le Zhishi was held very quietly by him. He didn't shed tears and didn't respond. He was even more silent than the lake. Song Yu felt a little uneasy because of this, as if Lezhishi believed that what he said was not effective, and he would no longer ask repeatedly like he did when he was a child, "Really? You promise."
He was a little afraid that Lezhishi grew up and didn't need his commitment anymore.
But Le Zhishi finally raised his hand and gently grasped the fabric of Song Yu's back waist, which gave Song Yu some comfort. Although at the end of the embrace, the wrinkles on the clothes disappeared, leaving no proof.
Feeling that Lezhishi's arms were a little cold, Song Yu offered to send him back. Standing on the plank road, they walked on thin ice, but they could hold their hands tightly. Once they returned to the shore, they returned to a safe distance.
When standing downstairs in the dormitory, Le Zhishi had recovered, as if he had forgotten the topic just now, he began to smile at Song Yu again, "If you go to the team for training, you can tell me in advance, I want to be with you Train together."
Song Yu nodded in agreement, then raised his hand to touch Lezhishi's face, and stroked the nape of Lezhishi's neck for a while.
These actions surpassed Lezhishi's expectations, making him like a puppy who got extra snacks. He was very happy, but he didn't dare to move. When he left Song Yu and went upstairs, he was even more desperate, even sad and disappointed in his heart. He said to Song Yu, don't touch me like this in the future.
But he hopes and likes it.
Walking to the fourth floor, Le Zhishi suddenly heard someone calling him by his name. As soon as he looked up and found that it was Shen Mi, he stood by the corridor window.
"Why are you here?" Lezhishi thought he was drunk and asked, "Are you okay?"
Shen Mi laughed and answered the second question first, "It's not that exaggerated. I'm just a bit on the face, but I'm not drunk." He quickly said: "I will send you a message after I go back. I came to the building by myself. After waiting for a while, you didn't go back, you were going to leave. I didn't expect you to come back just in time.
Le Zhishi also smiled, "Yes, my brother and I went shopping at school."
"I know." Shen Mi blurted out.
Le Zhishi originally wanted to ask him if there was anything wrong, but this kind of questioning method was not good, so he invited again, "Do you still want to go up and sit down?"
Shen Mi refused uncharacteristically, "No, it's getting late, you should rest soon. I just come to see you too, afraid you will be unhappy because of what happened tonight." He comforted, "Don't be disgusting with that kind of people. Happy, no need."
Le Zhishi nodded, "I know, don't worry." He stood in the corridor watching Shen Mi walk, waiting for him to walk downstairs, and saw his back into the next building from the window.
The feeling of insecurity still looms over Lezhishi. In the past, after he got Song Yu's assurance, this symptom would be relieved, but this time it didn't seem to be. Song Yuming made a promise, but it didn't help him at all.
When I was Lezhi, I felt very helpless.
But Song Yu did everything he promised, including training with Lezhishi. Although he was really busy, he practiced with Lezhishi at least twice a week. Once he was wearing glasses when he came, usually Song Yu would leave the glasses on the workstation in the laboratory to prevent them from being lost, because he would only wear them when he was studying and working. But he didn't even realize that time, and he was still wearing a white shirt that was not suitable for playing.
At that time, Le Zhishi was shooting a three-pointer. He was on the court facing the basketball hall gate. So when he saw Song Yu coming in, the goal he would surely score was missed. It was absurd. The land becomes the "three non-sticks."
Le Zhishi felt a little embarrassed, but Song Yu looked very good in a white shirt and glasses. When the two emotions clashed, he forgot what he was doing. He just stupidly said to Song Yu, "You wear glasses to play. Will it fall off?" Soon he felt that his question was silly, and added, "Probably not, your nose is very high."
Song Yu raised his hand and touched the glasses, only to find out what was wrong. He didn't say that he came from an impromptu meeting, only that he could see more clearly while wearing the glasses, so he didn't take it off.
He always does this, using no big and no small lies to cover up his thoughts that he doesn't feel pain or itching, anyway, Lezhi Shi can't tell the difference.
You will inevitably encounter Shenmi during training. At the beginning, Song Yu had a big prejudice against Shen Mi. He keenly felt Shen Mi's favor and strong desire to show off Lezhishi. He always felt that most people who liked Lezhishi just liked him. Appearance, or think that he is simple and kind, and easy to approach, but after getting along, he found that Shen Mi is indeed very good at Lezhishi, but he is too naive and too incapable of hiding.
A few times when Song Yu hugged Lezhi from behind, he taught him to throw the ball. When Shen Mi saw it, his hand movements would pause, and as if nothing had happened, he continued to train with others.
Others besides him would not be surprised because Song Yu and Le Zhishi acted too closely, because everyone assumed that they were brothers who grew up together.
The people in the basketball hall will not make fun of Le Zhishi and Song Yu, but they still can’t change the old problems of Song Yu and Nan Jia. Even if Nan Jia will seriously refuse every time, Song Yu will leave without giving a face. . Le Zhishi is also very curious sometimes, what exactly do people think they fit well.
When he was thinking, he would go to see Nan Jia. She is very beautiful, she has an expensive face, but she has no air. When you are gentle, you feel like spring breeze, and when you are tough, you will be convinced, rather than disgusted. Sometimes she and Song Yu would stand together inadvertently, and the picture was really beautiful.
After some thinking and observation, Lezhishi seemed to gradually believe in this fact.
They really match each other.
His recent mood was like the inaccurate weather in September. The day before it was so hot that he was wearing short sleeves, the temperature suddenly dropped the next day, and he was caught off guard.
Le Zhishi wore the wrong clothes twice, and ran back to the dormitory to add a coat after class. As if falling into a vicious circle, the cold aggravated his emotional depression.
It's been two weeks since Lingbomen night talks, and he still hasn't made much progress.
The professional class in the afternoon started late. Le Zhishi was taken to the cafeteria to have lunch with the seniors of the team. Song Yu, Qin Yan and Nan Jia were not there, so he sat next to Shen Mi, with another cheerful senior on his left. When they chat, they will talk about gossip about NBA games and other colleges. They were a little distracted when they learned. The professional class in the afternoon was difficult. He was a little slow in the first few sessions. The most frightening thing was that the professor didn't give the courseware. Buy a cup of coffee for dinner, and be more vigorous when attending class.
"Hey, Lele, ask you a question."
The words of the senior next to him interrupted Lezhishi's worries. He raised his head and looked at the senior's face seriously, "Well, what's the problem?"
"Has your brother really never been in a relationship before?" His expression was curious, "A boy like him should be chased by a lot of people."
"I haven't talked about it," Le Zhishi replied, "He doesn't seem to be very interested."
The senior sitting across from him laughed, "The key is generally not to tell my younger brother when I was in high school."
"You are right."
Le Zhishi shook his head, "He really doesn't. There has never been a girl near him."
"Really? We really don't understand the world of university tyrants. I heard that he scored high in the college entrance examination. It is absolutely impossible to go to study surveying and mapping such a hard-working profession."
"He likes this profession very much," Le Zhishi emphasized, "It's good if he likes it."
"You're really good to your brother. It would be great if I had a younger brother like you. I would take it out." The senior laughed and gave Lezhishi his own sizzling squid noodles. "Duo Eat some."
Le Zhishi couldn't say that he couldn't eat, but Shen Mi was quick, and took advantage of the senior's carelessness, and directly picked the noodles from his bowl.
"Hey, then I'll ask you another question." The senior turned his head again and looked at Lezhi, "Have you thought about what kind of sister-in-law will have in the future?"
The other boys all laughed unanimously, with a strange smile.
Le Zhishi shook his head, "No."
"Really?" A senior smiled diagonally, "Every time my brother takes his girlfriend home, I look more."
"Tsk tusk, Lao Zhang turns out you are this kind of person!"
"Hey, who doesn't like sister-in-law!"
"Don't bring bad boys." When the senior sitting opposite looked at Lezhi, "You really didn't think about it, what if..." He thought for a while, as if thinking of a good option, "I'll hit For example, if Senior Sister Nan Jia is your sister-in-law, would you be happy?"
Le Zhishi looked at him in silence, did not answer for a long time, and then suddenly coughed, which got worse and harder, and couldn't stop for a while.
"Senior, you guys are gossiping." Shen Mi said, "Senior Nanjia will get angry again when she knows."
"Just kidding, it's boring to eat."
"This kind of scandal shouldn't come true. An enemy like Song Yu is too powerful. If it wasn't him, I would still have a chance."
"The opportunity in your dreams!"
Lezhishi's stomach was a little uncomfortable, and a thin layer of sweat appeared on the palm of his hand, which seemed to be a sudden emotional stress response. The doctor told him from an early age that even if it is allergic asthma, he should pay attention to his emotions, be less sick, and be optimistic, so as to minimize the risk of the disease. He is an obedient child, and he has always asked himself that way.
But now it is more and more difficult for him to control his emotions, just like uncontrollable breathing when he is sick.
After eating, Shen Mi said that he wanted to pick up the courier and let Lezhishi accompany him. Of course, Lezhishi did not refuse, so they separated from the seniors. But Shen Mi didn't actually have an express delivery option. He took Lezhishi into the convenience store and bought him a hot milk tea.
"Please drink this, they said it tastes good." Shen Mi said.
Le Zhishi said thank you, "You always ask me to eat."
Shen Mi smiled, "The way you eat will make people feel better."
Le Zhishi said thank you again. The two people sat on high chairs drinking milk tea. Shen Mi talked a lot about the interesting things he had encountered recently. Le Zhishi listened in silence, occasionally being amused by him. After leaving the convenience store, Le Zhishi asked Shen Mi, "Do you think Nan Jia-senpai is worthy of my brother?"
Shen Mi stared at him for two seconds, and then laughed, "It's not my decision."
"Then who has the final say?"
"It doesn't count as anyone who said it." Shen Mi smiled, "I also said that you and I are best friends. It's not all about talking."
Le Zhishi was silent, and after a while he said, "You are my good friend."
Shen Mi didn't comment or answer this sentence, but he sent Le Zhishi to the door of the classroom all the way, and patted him on the shoulder again, "Le Le, don't think about anything, and walk around yourself. cheer up."
What Shen Mi said always made sense, but Lezhishi always couldn't listen to it.
Before the start of the professional class, Lezhishi sat in the lecture hall and read the previous notes again. He didn't want to be left behind, and it would make him more focused and calmer while studying. Class was about to begin. More and more classmates came in. They didn't feel it when Lezhi. He didn't look up until he rang the bell in class.
But it is not the old professor who is difficult to engage in standing at the podium, but Nan Jia.
Nan Jia’s voice in the microphone is a little more serious than usual. "Professor Wang attended a seminar today and there was no way to come to class. I am his assistant Nan Jia. In this class, I will show you some practical cases and review by the way. Let’s take a look at other things the teacher said before. You can also use it as a review and Q&A lesson."
She looked at the roster in her hand, and finally put it down, "I won't call it anymore, everyone should be quite conscious."
A boy joked: "Fortunately, I came today, and I made a lot of money."
Everyone laughed, including Le Zhishi.
He found that he couldn't hate Nan Jia anyway.
Nanjia's professional results have always been among the best, and his ability is very strong. I helped them sort out the content of the previous courses and the logical connection is very complete. Lezhishi felt that the parts that he hadn't understood before were cleared up, and some points that were difficult to remember could also be digested well.
After a big lecture, Nan Jia kept smiling, and many students greeted her when they left, and she responded one by one. Le Zhishi packed up his schoolbag and walked over, "Senior Sister."
"Well, did you see that I was surprised?" Nan Jia pulled out the U disk and went out with him, "Why are you not in good spirits, I will invite you to have a coffee, there is a self-service coffee in the corner of this floor? Machine, not bad, have you ever had it?"
Le Zhishi shook his head and said that this course was a bit difficult, and that he was suffering from a cold.
"Ah, I went to this door too, often in the clouds." She whispered to Le Zhishi, "This professor is very good at himself, and he is not good at lectures. But I have his previous courseware here, although it has been slightly modified. But it's almost the same, do you need it?"
"Yeah!" Lezhishi became happy and complained again, "He doesn't give courseware anymore."
Nan Jia led him to the self-service coffee machine at the corner and bought him a cup of caramel macchiato. He said it was the best drink with a strong nutty flavor.
"No time this time, next time I will take you to drink freshly ground coffee."
As he was talking, a girl walked by, and she called Nan Jia's name all the way away, "Why are you here!"
Nan Jia turned around, "Yueyue." She raised the coffee cup in her hand to her, "I just finished my teaching assistant class, and I have coffee with my younger brother to refresh myself. You said that our dormitory was leaking at noon, did you solve it?"
Le Zhishi looked at the senior sister named Yue Yue and guessed that they were roommates, as if they were very close. She walked over and greeted Le Zhishi kindly, "I know you, do Le Zhishi? You are Song Yu's younger brother."
"Good sister."
"Hello, hello, you are so famous, as soon as you came in, you became the yard of our law school, and a lot of people discussed you." She has a cheerful personality and is excited when she speaks.
Lezhishi shook his head embarrassedly, not knowing how to answer the conversation.
When Yueyue stared at Lezhi, she looked at Nan Jia again, winking at him, "Hey, you have such a good relationship with Song Yu's brother, do you have a plan?"
Nan Jia frowned, "What are you talking nonsense? It's impossible to deal with things."
"What are you holding back? Really." She smiled at Lezhishi again, "Tell you a secret, your Nanjia senior sister liked your brother when she enrolled in her freshman year."
Le Zhishi's heart was a bit dull. He opened his mouth and wanted to say something, but the other party said something first.
"You help your senior sister."
Before Lezhishi could react, Nan Jia found an excuse to part with her roommate and took Lezhishi and left.
They came out of the school building and sat down on the small garden bench at the back. During this period, Nan Jia kept saying to Le Zhishi, "My roommate is a more carefree girl. Don't take it seriously. It's a joke."
Later, Le Zhishi sat down, the coffee in his hand was a little cold, and he was ready to take in.
He didn't drink too much, but the caffeine worked faster than expected, and he felt his fingers tremble a little. I don't know if I don't wear less again, I feel a little cold when I'm happy.
Nan Jia said that he was always joking, not only Song Yu, but also others. She said and laughed again, "Someone is making fun of me and you, isn't it funny?"
She explained it as if she had confirmed their words.
Le Zhishi raised his eyes and looked at Nan Jia, "Senior sister, do you really like my brother?"
Nan Jia was quiet, and then sat next to Lezhishi. She looked down at the coffee in the cup and spoke for a while, "Yes, I liked him when I was a freshman. But..."
When she raised her head and looked at Lezhi, "Lele, I don't need you to help me."
Le Zhishi frowned, "Really?" He even gave Nan Jia a smile uncontrollably, and said something that he felt very hypocritical, "I can help you. I used to help someone pass it to him." Love letter, it’s okay to deal with those girls who can’t add his friends and turn around to find me.”
He wanted to say "If it were you, I would be more happy", but Lezhishi couldn't say it in the end.
He found that he even liked this feeling of self-harm now, as if he felt a little bit more painful, he wouldn't be so confused.
Nan Jia tilted her head and smiled at Le Zhishi, "The reason I said I don't need it is that I am in a stage of giving up slowly. However, I had a secret crush before, except for my own emotions. In fact, I haven't actually paid anything for the cost. Even if I like it, and then give up by myself, it won't affect Song Yu and others from start to finish."
Lezhishi couldn't understand, "Give up?"
He felt that giving up Song Yu was simply the hardest thing in the world.
"Can you really abandon him?"
Nan Jia looked into his eyes with a relaxed tone, "Doesn't giving up sound pretty unpromising? But in fact, I have my own consideration for making such a decision."
Her finger tapped the wall of the paper cup lightly, "I think there are two indicators to measure whether or not to give up a person: first, how likely is he to accept me? Second, I like him. Is it worth my time and emotion to reluctantly?"
Seeing that Lezhi was a little confused, Nan Jia explained with a smile, "Let’s talk about the first point first. I can obviously feel that Song Yu doesn’t like me. He is completely uninterested. This alone may be difficult. . Then I have to consider the second point. I like him and it’s not wrong, but this kind of liking is really worthy of my energy and giving up life, like an idol drama to pursue him desperately? Then he will fall in love with me , Give me a response?"
The wind rose, and a leaf fell on Nan Jia’s long skirt, but she did not brush it off, “You know, many people think that once a girl falls in love, she loses her mind and loves herself so much. But I can’t seem to do it. At this point, I have too many things I want to do, too many goals."
"So you don't think there is much hope for something, you can choose to give up, right?" Lezhishi asked.
"No. Rather than saying that, it is better to say that I am between him and myself, choosing myself." Nan Jia looked at him, "I love myself more than I like him. I don't want to give up myself, so Give up Song Yu."
Le Zhishi found out that Nan Jia was really sober, similar to Song Yu to a certain extent, but more minded than Song Yu.
"Senior Nanjia, you are really amazing." His tone was a little envious and sincere, "You can make decisions so rationally."
Nan Jia smiled bitterly, "Who wants to stay sensible in terms of feelings? It's not because you haven't got a preference."
She took a sip of coffee, "Actually, I faintly feel that Song Yu has someone he likes, maybe it's some kind of unreliable intuition."
This sentence made Le Zhishi a little uncomfortable. He was holding the bench with his hands and his nose was a little blocked, as if the cold suddenly worsened. He pretended to be curious and asked softly: "Really? Who do you think it is?"
"You don't know, of course I don't know." Nan Jia smiled, but after a while, the smile on her face gradually faded, "I just think that Song Yu is doing something to transfer him. Attention, such as the shooting I mentioned before. Sometimes he will be in a daze, as if thinking about someone. Girls are very sensitive and can feel it."
Le Zhishi's mood became very complicated. When Nan Jia really admitted that he liked Song Yu, he felt very painful, as if it was the same as they were about to be together and Song Yu would leave him. But Nan Jia said that she gave up, and Lezhishi suddenly developed a sense of relief that made her feel contemptuous, and she was obviously relieved.
But now, he has changed again. He can't wait to know if Song Yu really likes someone and who he likes.
It was terrible. Lezhishi felt that he couldn't bear it for a moment. No matter how he persuaded himself, such a mentality was obviously unhealthy and pathological, and definitely shouldn't be the thought that a younger brother should have.
"Lele, don't tell your brother what I said to you." Nan Jia gave him a pleased look, "I just want to explain it clearly to you so as not to cause more trouble. Besides, if he knows something, , You might feel embarrassed too."
Le Zhishi nodded, "I understand."
"Also..." Nan Jia exhaled and patted Lezhishi's shoulder, "The thoughts I said about love are only for myself, because I am very selfish and care about costs and rates of return. And I can feel the other person's heart belongs to. But—"
Her tone became solemn and full of encouragement, "If you meet someone you like, don't follow me. If you really like it, you still have to be brave."
Can't tell why, Lezhi suddenly looked a little bit sad, "Really?"
"Yeah. Maybe the other party is in the same mood. It would be a pity to miss it." Nan Jia raised her head, looked at the clouds in the sky, and said to herself, "Song Yu is very good, but I don't Poor, I will definitely meet someone who is willing to let me respond regardless of the cost."
Le Zhishi looked at Nan Jia's profile and hesitated for a while. In his heart, Nan Jia is a person who can help him get rid of the fog. She is sober and sincere, so that Lezhishi unconsciously generates trust.
Or maybe he really has nowhere to go, so he chose Nan Jia in a panic, hoping to get a life-saving straw from her, or a knife to cut off thoughts.
"Sister."
Nan Jia turned around, "Huh?"
Le Zhishi frowned slightly, his voice was very soft, "How to tell whether you like a person or other emotions?"
Looking at the expression in Lezhi's eyes, Nan Jia was silent for two seconds, and replied in a not too relaxed but calm voice: "LeLe, if you only have other feelings for a person, he is very good, you see He will be happy and warm when he thinks about it."
"Like what makes you feel uncontrollable pain."