John Bull left, and she was going to London by plane tonight. I also do n’t know where the large forces led by the rivets will land outside of Asia, but John Bull has already established a little force in London, and there is always a way to join the team. Before Dr. Ruan Li returned home, Fu Jiang and Zuo Chuan decided to leave. Of course, there would be no shortage of rooms at home, and I did not think that Dr. Ruan Li would drive them out after seeing the two, but Fu Jiang and Zuo Chuan were still there. Decided to rent a room nearby on the grounds of "not free under the fence". I told them my plan to establish a mysterious organization "whisperer" in this city. The two of them are naturally members of the organization. They have no objection. Of course, there is no emotion of excitement. These actions are used to get used to affairs in the mysterious circle. For human beings, there is no difference between good and bad, thinking or not, and it is as natural as breathing.

Probably, only those who encounter "mystery" for the first time, and their self-cognition is rapidly expanding, will they be excited and eager to establish a mysterious organization to change the world. Many people will always think that their uniqueness will make the whole world change with themselves as the core, but facts will prove that behind all changes in order and non-order, there are fragments that cannot be connected in human common sense. Link it up and you will see a dark abyss. Something hidden under the abyss will make people feel desperate, but that is the truth of this world.

There is no accident in this world, even if it becomes the protagonist of a story, to fight against, to prevent what. It's just a part of destiny, even without expectation. How much weight does this link occupy in the whole destiny. A script that no one can look at with his own cognition alone is weaving everyone's destiny, and all ideas that are free may be deceived by hallucinations.

Yes, if everything in your life, those changes and no changes, are assumed to belong to an established scene in a huge and complex script. That is really a desperate situation. Therefore, still narrow the horizon. Walking in the one-sided common sense of human beings, don't look at the darkness, and the crazy philosophical thoughts about fate, only this way. In order to let yourself live in a "suitable truth"-it may also be full of falsehoods and hallucinations, but at least it will not make you crazy.

And have long been a madman, or, rather, be a lunatic, and have to pursue the ultimate real person hidden in darkness and despair, there will be no compromise, even if, in the end, they will not be able to distinguish themselves, those they see "True" is true. Or it is still false, or it is already an illusion of delusion. Just like me.

I have n’t known for a long time. How much of what I have experienced is real and how much is illusion. What the eyes see, what the skin touches, what the ear hears and the nose smells, what they hear from others. What I have pieced together from bits and pieces of clues may be false. In theory, as long as there are enough clues, the truth can be pieced together, but the question is, how many clues are needed? At least, I have never obtained enough clues to “make myself very convinced that this is true”, and I do n’t think I can get so many clues.

For me, everything is hidden in the mist, and only by chance the half scale of the scale is exposed, and the half scale of the scale is absolutely impossible for people to imagine what it is like when the fog is completely removed. The so-called “hospital reality” and the so-called “doom illusion” are nothing but relative environments. In my mind, there is no basis for independent existence of the two, so there is no certainty, and one of them is absolute. real.

If it must be said that there is something that can be used as a reference to determine absolute truth, then there is only Jiang. I once assumed that even "Jiang" is just an illusion, but this assumption is too crazy, it will subvert the reason why I am my foundation, so I abandoned it.

Therefore, no matter what kind of things Fu Jiang does, I will not be surprised and will not stop, because, even if she does not have this self-knowledge, I know that she is a manifestation of "Jiang". "Jiang" is beyond my understanding, so I will make assumptions and guesses, but I will not really try to understand its essence and behavior, and regard "inexplicable" and "inexplicable" as its basic attributes, and then To do what you should do.

So, although I hope to introduce Fu Jiang to Dr. Ruan Li, Saki Ye, and Bajing, since Fu Jiang has other ideas, I have no objection. When Dr. Ruan Li returned home at the usual time, I was greeted by myself as usual, as if I had never left. However, Dr. Ruan Li did not send it so well. In this world of repeaters, the past "Gaochuan" has a serious history of mental illness, and that past naturally inevitably becomes my past today, and in the previous tens of days During my relationship, I also did a lot of examinations in Dr. Ruan Li ’s clinic. None of them proved that I had become a “normal child”. After missing for a week now, although Dr. Ruan Li didn't lose his temper, he was also very certain-I got sick again.

Because of mental problems, it is inexplicable to travel to Europe and get married, which is a reason for "sounds justified". That night, Miyake and Bajing came to me, but they were immediately persuaded by Dr. Ruan Li: "I did n’t want to tell you, and I always felt that if something was said too clearly, it would prevent Achuan from returning to normal society. However, His problem is a bit serious now, and I do n’t want you to feel embarrassed because you do n’t know. ”

"What's wrong with A Chuan?" Sakuya was anxious. She looked at me. I was only separated by a door gap between them. In the narrow gap, they saw their profile-Dr. Ruan Li did not bind me I got up, but forced me not to leave her study, and I knew very well that this command and my choice were originally a kind of psychological test. The answer to this test is actually not fixed, because the factors that determine the answer are very complex. Only Dr. Ruan Li knows the current environment, state, and Dr. Ruan Li ’s past observations. Each of my movements will be a mentally ill standard in the questionnaire in her mind. This standard will become the basis for some observations, questions, judgments and treatments.

If you switch to other patients. In fact, it is very difficult for me to clearly recognize that I am being applied with a strong and targeted method like this, "Try not to let mental patients know that they are undergoing mental observation and treatment" is Dr. Ruan Li's treatment plan It is an extremely important part in the world, but in reality, it is impossible to achieve this level of perfection, in the question and observation stage. Patients who appear extremely anxious by shouting "I am not sick" have also encountered a lot. However, in general, the treatment behavior designed by Dr. Ruan Li will try to keep the patient from being confined by the idea of ​​"self-psychological problems".

just. When faced with a patient who "knows that he has a serious mental illness" like me, those conventional methods will be useless, and even continued use will have extremely bad consequences. Therefore, for my situation, Dr. Ruan Li also has another plan.

Now, I am persuaded to stay in the room, and the door of the room opens a gap, so that I can vaguely see the conversation scene. Hearing the content of the conversation, as well as the content of Dr. Ruan Li's conversation itself, plus "I have been with Dr. Ruan Li for many years. Knowing psychology and understanding the usefulness of these arrangements to a certain extent" are designed for my situation Out of the scene. Although I have studied psychology by myself, I have also applied psychology knowledge on many occasions in the past, but. Dr. Ruan Li is the real expert, and I simply cannot judge. What effect she wants to achieve through this kind of scene layout, I have judged that it is really the most appropriate answer without confidence. Therefore, it is impossible to take the initiative to deceive the doctor like those mental patients with high IQ.

I finally made the choice of "honestly listen to Dr. Ruan Li's instructions", but just across the door gap, and occasionally collided with the eyes of Saki Ye. I also believe that Dr. Ruan Li has been observing the expression changes of Misaki and Bajing, and in this study, there must be hidden cameras to capture the changes in my expression at all times. Even if there is no expression on the face like the eight scenes, it is also meaningful to Dr. Ruan Li, because "expression on the face" in psychology is also a kind of carrying a lot of information in contact with the environment at the time. Emoji.

"So, doctor, do you mean that A Chuan's spirit is wrong?" Bajing finally spoke.

"Yes, and the problem is very serious." Dr. Ruan Li said.

"Achuan told us about his mental problems, we know that he still wants to be friends with him!" Miyaki said anxiously: "Indeed, Achuan often said some inexplicable words, but he never hurt us, We also believe that he will not do that in the future. "

"If the doctor judges that Achuan has been missing for so long before he judges that he has a mental problem ... we actually know some reasons why he did this." Bajing said: "I hope we can act as an assistant in your treatment, we He is his friend, there must be something we can do. "

Dr. Ruan Li, as always, with a sympathetic and warm professional smile, said: "You are right, I do have this idea, but not now. Achuan has a serious mental illness, and I am his attending doctor, also his Mother, I know your maintenance of Achuan, but I also hope that you can believe me. Everything I do is for his good. "

"Doctor, it is because he went to Europe after his disappearance and got married inexplicably, did you judge that his mental illness started again? Based on these circumstances, did you make today's treatment plan?" The eight scenes are repeated very hard.

Dr. Ruan Li didn't have any superfluous expression and smiled and answered the eight scenes: "No."

Her answer was so concise that even the eight sceneries were surprised, and her emotions were fully expressed on her face.

"Achuan's condition is very special. It is not enough to judge the specific problem only by the environment and those words when he notified me." Dr. Ruan Li's tone was very soft, and he was not angry at the two girls' doubts. , I think she is really lifeless, because this conversation may be a link full of psychological factors. I do n’t even think that Bajing and Saki Ye can be smart enough to be truly anti-guests, and take the initiative in the dialogue. Dr. Ruan Li ’s knowledge and practical experience are much stronger than that of the female high school students. It is overwhelming power.

Bajing seemed to realize this, and opened his mouth several times. But hesitated in the end, and then said: "Can't we really stay and watch?"

"Yes, not tonight. But. I will not stop you from continuing to be friends with Achuan. Achuan needs friends than anyone else." Dr. Ruan Li touched the heads of the two girls. "Trust me, please As a psychologist, an attending doctor and a mother, I will not do anything that is meaningless and will negatively affect my sick child. "

"I know. We believe you, doctor." Bajing pulled Saki Ye a little. Say goodbye to Dr. Ruan Li: "Can we come to pick up Achuan to school tomorrow?"

"You can come after school hours, but in the next few days, I will help Achuan take leave." Dr. Ruan Li replied: "When will Achuan return to school. It takes some observations before deciding."

Dr. Ruan Li ’s attitude was gentle and firm. Bajing and Saki Ye had to accept this result. They glanced at me through the door slit and said to me loudly, “Achuan, we will come to see you again tomorrow, and we will carry our schoolbag left."

Dr. Ruan Li returned to the study. In front of me, he retrieved the image data from the computer and wrote it on a file. I sat on the other side of her desk. This situation made me trance, as if I had returned to the "hospital reality" and was receiving another doctor's treatment. There was silence in the study. Dr. Ruan Li raised his head several times to observe my expression, but did not speak, and the tension in the atmosphere kept changing. However, I think that the reason why I feel the change. It is entirely because of their own personal emotions and consciousness that are fluctuating, among the factors that dominate these feelings. Dr. Ruan Li is not the active party. No matter what kind of response I make, there is actually no difference for Dr. Ruan Li. All she wants to see is "My Response".

About thirty minutes or so, Dr. Ruan Li put the files together and said to me with a very serious attitude: "Achuan, we have done these treatments many times, and you must be familiar with them."

"Yes, mother." I replied quietly, as she said, in "hospital reality", I have accumulated too much experience. However, this does not mean that I can make a targeted response to any of the following situations-this kind of mental detection, there are no fixed questions and answers. Through the understanding of the patient, according to the difference between the patient's past and present, the truly talented doctor can design a lot of questions around a core. If you feel that, you can resolve the core through these questions in reverse, and then you can also ask questions. If you are targeted, it is undoubtedly a naive idea. Because, when a skilled psychologist is fully prepared to apply psychological measures to a patient, the core of various problems will be covered by the problem itself, and the only one who can fight it is " Psychopathic patient degenerates from a mental patient. "

And I am not a psychologist, even if I can learn psychology in a targeted manner when I know that I am a mental patient, there are too many external and internal factors that make me unable to be a real one. Psychology expert. And the doctor Ruan Li in front of me is undoubtedly talented, and the day after tomorrow is also working very hard, putting all his career energy into this line, and has extremely rich clinical experience. expert.

Trying to cover up yourself will only make your flaws bigger, and I have no reason to cover up in front of Dr. Ruan Li. Even if I do n’t think subjectively, everything I have encountered in the toilet talk is not a mental illusion-this is imaginable to me personally, but I will not voluntarily admit it. After all, this is not just about the toilet. Strange talk about this event, once it is denied, its consequences will be chained to a larger level, for example: everything I have experienced in the past to the present is only illusory. As long as you think about this conclusion subconsciously, it makes me feel full of terrible destructive power. I would rather not think so.

Yes, even if I encountered something, it is a real thing. Dr. Ruan Li is just an ordinary person, so I have no experience with "mystery", I still need Dr. Ruan Li's help, because I am a mental patient, mental level On the question, it is not possible to distinguish between "mysterious" and "daily".

In the end, I chose to start talking about the toilet, and then I told Dr. Ruan Li about the things I experienced, even when I was facing Sakuya and the Eight Scenes, I did not say so in detail. I have a "convict" here in Dr. Ruan Li's, about the "doom illusion" situation, and my adventures with the past illusion illusion, and even everything I encountered in the "hospital reality", with the "past diary" "The way is recorded in the document, and this document is copied by Dr. Ruan Li. At this moment, she is right in front of me, copying this file copy, referring to this" black history ", go Learn about the "phantom story" I am telling today.

Taking me as the center, in the eyes of Dr. Ruan Li, what happened is the proof that I have a serious mental illness. She studied the story I said, not because she believed it, but because she believed that she could assess my mental changes during the "onset" from the setting, structure, context and development of this story . Combined with past medical history information and the latest psychiatric diagnosis information, I can assess my current mental state to determine which treatment I need and whether it can be put back into the society-I am in the eyes of Dr. Ruan Li , Has always been "aggressive and severely mentally ill", even if she did not disclose these materials, let me get the opportunity to live a normal life and study.

The former is her responsibility to the chief physician, the latter is her love for her adoptive mother-I think so.

It took me about three hours to roughly tell the new story of the toilet talk, and then was asked by Dr. Ruan Li about the details she wanted to hear, including the most subtle psychological changes I had at that moment-from what I said, naturally It was very subjective, and at that time, I did think about it all the time-these things, Dr. Ruan Li knew very well that all she needed was this. In the process of my narrative, Dr. Ruan Li placed great emphasis on organization and storytelling. That is to say, from the beginning of the narrative, there was no opportunity for "supplementary explanation". What she wanted was that I was able to treat the things that had just ended. At the same time as the story, it is organized into a "fiction that is flat and straightforward, but has a high and low tide waveform in structure". Although, when I called in that European city, I made a general explanation, but this time the face-to-face communication, the requirements are undoubtedly higher, I always feel that this is a very difficult thing. I often have to pause to sort out what I want to say. Fortunately, Dr. Ruan Li did not mind me doing this, but encouraged me to say so.

Dr. Ruan Li believes that ~ lightnovelpub.net ~ this kind of "storytelling" is itself a very targeted process of psychotherapy. Being able to organize a story, being organized and storytelling, can prove that a person's thinking ability is normal in function and qualified in performance, and while telling a story, it is organized and storytelling, It also makes it easier for listeners to analyze the psychological state of the narrator more clearly from the content-where is negative? Where is positive? What about negative and positive conversions? Because an on-site storyteller with sensibility and storytelling is "a matter of his own experience", it is impossible to completely stand on the perspective of a completely sensible third party and integrate his own consciousness and Emotional changes are completely covered up, and in the process of alienating the story, it is also a kind of re-examination of oneself, to get rid of the seemingly positive or negative emotional thinking interference at the time of the story, and to understand it in a "more authentic state" Correct yourself.

This treatment method was called "self-correcting method" by Dr. Ruan Li. It has extremely strict requirements not only for the storyteller itself, but also for the story itself. For the story, there is a key prerequisite before being organized and storytelling, that is, "temporary creation". This story cannot be prepared long ago, after being sculpted, it should be formed in real time, and One of the most important qualities for doctors who implement this treatment is to clearly distinguish whether the story the patient is telling is "temporary creation" or "prepared early" or "prepared early but pretended Is a temporary creation ". To be continued