There are many questions that have not been answered. When others can understand the same thing, I have been confused. It seems that I have drilled the horns of the horns. Looking around, it is not the answer I want. No matter whether I am a bystander or a party, these incomprehensible origins from the event itself and the roots behind the event have not changed at all. Even so, for me, there are still more important things than getting answers.

Therefore, I interrupted Dr. Ruan Li's explanation of the situation in front of me. What "psychological integration device", what "special circumstances lead me to observe this mental integration device from a different angle to other patients", etc. are not as good as "Doctor Ruan Li in this repeater world, what is The question of how to treat all this is more important.

Whether Dr. Ruan Li is dead or alive is also not very important. I can still hear her voice. She is by my side when I need help the most, so what is important is that she Cognition of the situation is not objective. What I want to know is subjective.

"Mom, are you happy?" I asked.

It seemed that Dr. Ruan Li, who was planning to explain the current situation for me, heard this question, and his voice was interrupted. How long has it been interrupted? There is no detailed count, but it is not a short-term feeling. I think she is sorting her mood. She is seriously thinking about my problems, and maybe thinking about why I say that. All in all, when her voice sounded again, it was neither serious nor urgent. It gave me a soothing and warmth that I haven't seen for a long time. Just when I heard the voice, I felt that she must be smiling at this time. of. Calm and quiet smile.

"Shouldn't be said to be happy, Achuan." She said: "The world is destroyed, what's so happy about? And. I'm already dead."

I was just silent.

After a pause, she went on to say: "But. My idea is feasible. My action proves my theory. At the end, I proved myself in my own way. Maybe I didn't save the world, but just As an individual, I have no regrets. Others may have lost and died. That is a very tragic thing, however, I did not betray them, but luckily won the last, so, to say guilt, I do n’t have anything at all. This feeling is not melancholy, because. The result at the moment is not unexpected. In that case, it should be a pleasure. It ’s not cheating, nor deliberately doing evil. The mood is not the initiative to use other people's sacrifice in exchange for their own victory, just to act on the opportunity, use your own knowledge and cognition to defeat the evil opponent, how can it not be pleasant? "

"That's enough." Something heavy in my heart has been put down, "I've always been afraid that you will regret it. You will feel at a certain moment when you think you did something before. It's better not to do that, I'm also afraid that you will resent. Complaining about why you have encountered such a bad thing. Because I feel that this world should not be like this, so I am full of unwillingness ... "

"Ah, ordinary people will have this kind of thinking." Dr. Ruan Li said: "Sorry, regret, guilt, complaining, unwillingness, feeling untimely, and being owed by many people, this is a very ordinary idea. In the end, we did nothing wrong, just because something we did n’t understand came to this planet inexplicably, so everyone died, no matter how struggling, we could n’t save all the disasters and pains that appeared in the end. There is no chance to make up for the wrong things that I have done. Although at the time, I felt that it was correct to do it, it should be, something that could not be done, but I still felt that it would be fine if I could not do it. "

"But mom, don't you have such an idea at all?" I said.

"Well, because I tried my best to do what I could do, even if my death was used, what else can't be put down?" Said Dr. Ruan Li: "I never thought I was a superman, Although I feel that I will definitely win, before the victory, the theoretical probability of success is also very slim. It is rather said that what I have done now has exceeded my expectations. So ah, no, maybe I am still a little worried. "

"Worried?" I was a little puzzled.

"Well, worry about Achuan you ... No, Achuan you have your own way of life and methods of observing this world, maybe not the same as normal people, but you do live for so long in your own way, so there is nothing to worry about. In the past, I had thought that you are different and you will be rejected by many people. However, in this world, no one will criticize you because of your difference, so this worry is meaningless. Dr. Li paused and said, "I probably just couldn't be with you anymore, so I feel a bit lonely."

"Mom ..." I couldn't help crying. The faint emotions in my heart were fluctuating. Although it was only faint, it could not be erased or stopped. I did not wipe away my tears, but the tears still flowed quietly.

"Do you just want to know this? Achuan, but I heard your inner call, and at the end of the last, I hurriedly said the last few words to you in this way. I think, are you Confused, I just don't understand what is going on now? Do you want to know what to do in the future? Do you want to listen to some elders' advice? "Dr. Ruan Li said calmly and gently.

"Yes. It's just that, just knowing that you left with such a mood, it's enough, mom ..." I want to tell her if I have a stomach, but at this time, I don't know how to say it, But what I said was definitely what I most wanted to say, as long as she was not with that hatred, unwillingness and guilt is enough. This is absolutely true. I want to confirm how she sees all this, not to know what the world looks like in her eyes, but just to know how to see the world in which she is and what she is facing in her heart The right result.

"To be honest, I'm stupid, mother." I shed tears, but at the end I felt that I could smile, so I should be smiling. "I do n’t understand the theoretical things you said. You mean, I am special. So I can observe, touch, and end it in ways that others ca n’t. But in fact, Whether I am really special or not, what I want to do has never changed. The only difference is whether I can do it. I am not acting according to the theories you described, but just according to my own feelings and Just act intuitively. "

"So?" Dr. Ruan Li asked back.

"So, don't worry, mother." I can finally raise my hand and wipe away the tears. "Although I'm stupid, I always face a lot of confusion, a lot of problems that trouble me, and I can't calm down my heart. I will probably spend it in useless thinking in my life. There are a lot of contradictory things waiting for me, maybe it will die suddenly in an incomprehensible situation. But, it does not matter, this is my life. I can already accept it. "

Yes, my view of the world is different from that of many people. What I have seen and the perception of these things are not the same as most people. However, we are indeed looking at the same things and facing the same situation. Just as in the eyes of Dr. Ruan Li and me, is the "spiritual integration device" or something else in front of you, and what kind of state is You Jiang, whether it is an illusion or a real thing. There may be different understandings. However, the two of us are at the same time. Meet again in this way and witness the situation together. Of course, it cannot be two completely different and completely unrelated situations.

The end is the end, death is death, and what really does not exist will not exist. Since it already exists, then it is inevitably impossible to be non-existent. The existence or non-existence of this observed phenomenon is different. In essence, it is "existence" and "non-existence", which is the most unreasonable. The inevitable existence, observed as "existence" and "non-existence", does not change the fact that this thing must exist.

I accept the idea that there are no doubts about those people and things that have existed in my life and those that have disappeared. Perhaps in my observation, they exist all at once, disappear all at once, The child was alive, and died all of a sudden. It was such a face, and suddenly another face. However, their essence exists, and their existence is intertwined with my existence, even if this intertwined is full of incomprehensible and incredible, but the intertwined story itself, for the one in it, So full and full.

Whether it is true or unreal in the eyes of others, whether it is true or unreal in theory, whether it is true or illusory, only for me, what I have observed All of this is part of my life, the part of meaning that runs through my life, and is the most important thing that cannot be let go.

I think that this is actually the truth that you are looking for has always been around, intertwined with yourself, something you don't need to find, but at some point, you even forget it, or you can't accept it. However, when you accept it, assume it, and believe that this is your life, then no matter how many problems there are in theory, it is no longer the most important problem.

"Really? Well, since you said so, Achuan ..." Dr. Ruan Li said: "I am a dead person, and I can't say much."

"Just be happy," she said to me.

You are happy that her mouth is not ridicule, hastily tolerated and understood, for me, this is not a derogatory word.

"Mom, you now are just a dream, an illusion?" I asked.

"Perhaps, no, for you, that's probably it." Dr. Ruan Li said: "But, as you think, whether it's an illusion or a dream is actually not important. What matters is only her" The sound, as at the end, seems to fade away.

The important thing is that you and I want to see each other again.

Goodbye, Achuan.

I woke up in a trance, and I felt like I had a dream, no, that was probably a dream, a farewell in the dream, it should have been the way to answer the current situation in this way, but, Instead of answering doubts, I chose something that I think is more important. So, after finishing this matter, I feel comfortable. This is really a rare dream.

With this light and happy mood, according to the instructions of my feelings, I inserted my hand hard into this possibly spiritually integrated device, in the huge and weird thing, as far as I can see, it was more like inserting a tree trunk by hand Obviously it seems to be a very hard thing, however, the process of piercing is like reaching into the jelly. My left eye twitched violently, bleeding like tears. With this vision covered by blood, paying attention to the changes around me, this vision suddenly turned upside down.

I do n’t know what kind of internal changes caused by my insertion ~ lightnovelpub.net ~ I just think that there will be no bad changes. The victory Dr. Ruan Li meant in his dream, which was what I was doing at this time, had a chain reaction. She opened her head and made a switch. Other people struggled to just install the switch, and I was the one who pulled the switch. What role did "Jiang" play in it? I thought jokingly, wouldn't it be a "circuit" in series.

However, I am also very clear that there is no answer to my question.

There was severe pain in my left eye, and the feeling of being upside down was so clear, but I did not "fall" into the air from the ground. The dark and deep sky, as if turning upside down, opened the invisible curtain and exposed all the stars that had been covered before. When that blue planet emerged from the end of the horizon, I realized that the place where I was actually turned out to be the "Moon", and this huge, completely unknown thing was in the form of invisible monsters and huge white. The strange things that appeared after Claudia's battle ended in the moon.

I couldn't help thinking of the dreamy Milky Way railway train. If the passengers really exist, in the eyes of those passengers, have they just passed the moon and are heading towards the edge of the solar system and toward the depths of the Milky Way? I laughed again, thinking how naive and fairytale my thoughts should be. (To be continued.) Mobile phone users please visit the mobile phone URL