290 incomplete combustion (3)

I saw these burning eyes again. Since I recognized this room, I had a hunch that I could see her again. She was not here at the beginning, which deeply disappointed me. Now she appears like a ghost, but I am not surprised at all. Why should you be surprised? This is in a dream. And I was so hoping to see her again and touch her. The temperature and softness from the skin makes me almost think this is reality.

But this is in a dream. I always think so.

Zhen Jiang is dead. She is not real in front of her, she is a beautiful dream, a ghost that exists only in virtual and illusion, comes from my heart and the deepest desire of cells-I tell myself so, but stare at the black deep 'S eyes, but couldn't agree with such a pretext in the bottom of my heart-God, she is so real, she is standing in front of me!

I stood there quietly, letting tears flow out of my eyes. Tell me, Zhenjiang, how can I save you? How can I stay with you forever?

She didn't answer. Isn't this a matter of course? This is just a dream, just my illusion. The distance between her and me is less than ten centimeters, but it looks like a painting.

"My dear, I miss you so much. I really miss you. The days without you are like a nightmare." Like talking to myself, I covered my face with my hands.

The dream is over.

When I let go of my hands, I saw a familiar ceiling. Lying on the bed in the dormitory, it was dark and quiet all around, like there was a huge hollow, engulfing everything.

I feel thirsty and my body is as bad as ever, as if the blood is boiling and the cells are burning. I groped for the medicine at the head of the bed, opened the lid and poured it into my mouth to chew and swallow. I felt a numbness in my legs and could hardly stand up.

Can't stand up?

No, I am a person with legs. But this feeling gave me a sense of surprise. Immediately afterwards, I suddenly realized that these days, my feet were completely unconscious, and now, it has a sense of paralysis.

I think I know whether this represents something, but at this time, I didn't think at all, or I was afraid to think.

I touched my calf carefully, stroking along the curve of my muscles, like touching a fragile glass. Gradually, the skin of the legs came with a slight touch, like soft feathers sliding across the skin. An electric current passed through my mind in an instant, and I doubted the strength of my palm.

Yes, this is not wrong! I can feel it! My feet felt it!

I couldn't wait to move my legs, but as a result, my waist was strained, and my legs were just pulled and moved. This is not what I want!

"Come on, come on! Come on, come on!" I mumbled to cheer myself up, moved to the bed, and put my legs on the ground.

I tried to stand with my hands on the edge of the bed, but my feet were vain and I immediately fell to the ground when I let go of my hands. The pain made me wake up all at once, and I still couldn't walk. But I still want to try it, no, no matter how long it takes, I will try it, because at this moment, I feel the pain from my legs when I fall. The clearer. The more painful it is, the more courage I have in my heart.

I can stand up!

I can stand up!

I have no time to think and try to support my body with both hands. I think I must first be able to kneel and crawl on my knees. I noticed the wheelchair on the side and pushed it aside without thinking, just dragging my body and crawling on the ground to the bathroom.

In the process, Zhenjiang's face appeared in my mind more than once in the dream, and the burning eyes seemed to burn up. A strong emotion keeps accumulating, accumulating, like the hot magma buried in the crust. I used to touch my left eye habitually, I think she is here, beside me, even if she is between two worlds, she has never left.

Yes, she has not left, whether in that world or in this world, she has always been there. I used to believe so, but now this trust is fermenting.

The days with her are so beautiful. The moment I met her, everything changed for me—my life, my thoughts, my way—if I were a lunatic, it must be because I enchanted her.

The bathroom didn't turn on the light, and I couldn't touch the switch when I crawled on the ground. For a moment, I seemed to hear the flapping wings, and there seemed to be a black bird flying across a corner of the room. But when I look at the past, there is nothing in the black hole. I think it's quark, and it's the same, never left me, although I can't see it from time to time. Others think this is my illusion, but I can really hear its sound, see its figure, and even feel the touch of the feather when touching it. I sometimes think, if this is an illusion, then what is true?

I grabbed the edge of the sink and pulled my body up. My legs are as if they have no bones, but I am full of energy and want to stand up. Then, I felt the strength of the support, it was so weak, like a young bird just out of the shell, but it does exist, and this is not my illusion.

With the strength of my arms and legs, I stood up trembling for the first time.

Sweaty, I gradually got used to my dark eyes and dimly saw the embarrassed face in the mirror. Her hair was on her forehead, her cheeks were thin, her face was pale, and she was a terminally ill patient, but those eyes-those black eyes seemed to be burning! It made me unclear whether it was the eyes of Zhen Jiang in the dream or my own eyes.

It ’s incredible. Before this night, my legs did n’t have any consciousness. However, after a belated dream, I could already stand in front of the mirror with my own strength.

I think this is the power that Zhenjiang has brought to me. Through time and space, through reality and illusion, a miracle created with her extraordinary power.

I know you must think I am crazy, but at this moment, I think so, so firmly believe. My body is undergoing some incredible change because of meeting Jiang Zhen again. Just when I thought so, the face in the mirror slowly twisted in my surprised gaze.

Face, facial features, hair ... everything is stretched and shaped like crumpled plasticine. I opened my eyes wide, and the changeable face could not see what it looked like, but I was sure that it must not be what I looked like. Gradually, the hair became longer, and the drooping bangs covered his eyes, making it look like a girl, a girl, or a woman? No matter how it changes, it makes me feel very familiar, it is a woman I know.

Who is it? Is it Zhenjiang? It's still changing, sometimes like Zhenjiang in the doomsday world I dreamed of this evening, and sometimes like Zhenjiang in an orphanage I dreamed of earlier. It just rubs between girls and women. The original face and facial features, which are different, are gradually similar in this blur. At first it made me feel that no matter which one is the same Zhenjiang.

The face in the mirror is not mine, but another person's. This weird thing didn't make me feel scared, it just made me stretch out my hand and wanted to touch and confirm. When my fingers touched my cheeks, there was a trance in front of my eyes. When I recovered, the strange changes in the mirror completely disappeared, as if never appeared. And I in the mirror is covering my cheek with my palm.

Still the face of the terminally ill patient.

The next moment, I realized that my hands were not propped by the sink. I am standing firmly in front of the mirror with my feet.

Me, stand up!

God, it ’s incredible!

I tried to move my legs. It was still a bit soft. It was like running a marathon, but the remaining strength was enough to support me and prevent me from falling.

Although it is unbelievable, the burning sensation of the body is becoming irreversible. I feel free from that strong emotion. I feel that the cells are almost thirsty, and the internal organs are about to become coke. Although I do n’t show any signs at all in the mirror, I still feel that I will melt in the next moment.

I put cold water on my face at the faucet and poured water from my stomach. This burning sensation started to weaken. I kept panting and my body was very painful, but what was it compared to when I stood up again? Strange to say, this more intense burning pain than before did not weaken the body as usual, but it made me feel that my condition was getting better. This may be somewhat illusory, but I am really energetic at this time.

It was still some time before dawn, and I went back to my bedroom to open a diary full of stories, and referred to the "Human Completion Plan" prepared by Dr. Ander for the material at this stage of the script. Maybe it's because of better health, maybe because of dreams about Zhenjiang, and I found my analysis of the original script of Doomsday's story more heart-warming. This is not to say that I did n’t care about these stories and settings. It was just because I had to study them passively because of mental and physical reasons. The feeling of being forced is exhausting, but now there is a kind of Subjective initiative has made me more focused in my research, so that I can better understand the secrets hidden in these seemingly simple and absurd scripts.

As mentioned earlier, the script is the core, and it is expanded by some kind of supercomputer to become a relatively perfect virtual world. This is a huge project that is enough to get lost. This virtual world is very targeted, and the only user is the script author himself, because the core script is a world that can be justified by the creator himself and has a strong self-world view, so it is pre-prepared through drugs and other means. Once the user after the processing enters this world, he is faced with a fake world.

It is not a virtual game, nor a pure psychotherapy, but to transform the user's personality.

The expansion of the world architecture through some kind of supercomputer is not so much based on the script, but rather based on the psychology of the script author. Therefore, although the "Human Completion Plan" involves human microstructure, biopathology and new viruses, it is not a biochemical test but a psychological test. All biochemical methods are only used as auxiliary tools, which fully conform to the essence of this hospital .

As the first stage of script production, it fully embodies this feature.

Dr. Ande very simply divided the key of the treatment process into three steps-access, activity and logout-there is nothing special, but these three steps are not simply handled by machinery, but Hidden in the script with a psychological hint.

This means that the script is no longer a simple storyline and setting, but also as a means of controlling the progress of the treatment.

The important rules are as follows:

One: The world must have an end, and there is an unsteady process that clearly tends to end, which can ensure that the user has a minimal concept of "treatment process" subconsciously, and thus ensure that the user's psychology is in the development of the plot Fierceness, activity, and initiative can also be used as consciousness insurance to "go out of the world." This also means that choosing the end of the world is not my own pure desire, but to a large extent, it is a script demand.

Second: The user's role setting must refer to the current user's psychological state and personality traits, and evaluate the impact of the three perspectives, psychology and personality of the role setting and the current user integration to ensure that the user gets psychological and personality level "Make up".

Third: It is best to use the actual characters recognized or consciously recognized by the user as the template, but it must be heavily modified to make the user feel plausible and vague. These roles must be reasonably distributed between the positive and negative sides, and combined with user memory to set the stage of emergence, through the role appearance and plot transition to focus on the control of the treatment process, and evaluate the staged treatment results. Of course, this role setting also has the performance requirements of the unknown supercomputer in the virtual process.

Fourth: Try to avoid involving blood relationship.

Fifth: You must ask for obvious hints, such as the "two weeks" mentioned in the story.

In addition to these points, any seemingly insignificant settings in the script, or absurd and boring plots, are more or less auxiliary psychological hints, or to protect the safety of the user, or catalyze the change of the user , Or to assist the supercomputer in the operation of the virtual world, or to set up some unknown emergency insurance and institutions.

I can even believe that every detail in the script is not untargeted. After being handled by Dr. Ander, what is hidden in this script is completely beyond my current level of understanding. The requirements for the creation of these extremely demanding scripts, exposed or hidden, are the basis on which the "Human Completion Plan" can be carried out. Through them, Dr. Ander can also control the treatment process to a certain extent. It is also the reason why I am still alive and did not die or collapse during treatment.

My current job is to modify the script according to my current situation before "treatment" to conform to my current personality, memory and mental state. Afterwards, this script was evaluated and reviewed by Dr. Ander and reconstructed from the perspective of his professionalism and the performance of supercomputers, and it was the “script” that could finally be used.

I am ruminating these materials, guessing what Dr. Ander might make from his perspective, and digging out more possibilities. I have a ridiculous idea, or rather hope-can the script be used to restore the personality of the dead? Is it possible to bring certain personalities into my reality through my body as a medium through this healing process? Is the series of weirdness happening in my body now a possibility of illusion invading reality?

Maybe, I can make up for something missing in the three girls, Sakuya, Bajing and Marceau.

Maybe, I could find Jiang, who was hidden in my body, the missing color and Dorothy.

Maybe, I can recover them who are dead or not real.

Perhaps, I will not "disappear" like Gao Chuan before.

Yes, it must be! All possibilities are hidden in the creation of the script and hidden in the "Human Completion Plan". There are many proper nouns that I cannot understand in the materials at hand. These incomprehensible things may not be important at the stage of script writing, but they are probably some of the key screws in those possibilities.

I need more information, but I do n’t think Dr. Ander will tell me more.

I can't help but miss the guy in Dallas, what is he doing now?

While thinking, I began to try to write a new story script. Gradually, I began to have a feeling of going back to the past, as if I were still in the world of the end, writing my own adventure in the diary, dreaming of the total One day I will publish it and be regarded as a fairy tale by the people who have broken away from the end, and Zhen Jiang stands behind me, reading the story of me and her silently as the pen travels.

Yes, I seem to feel Zhenjiang standing behind me. I dare not look back, for fear that that figure will become a bubble in a flash. At least at this time, it made me think that she was standing behind me.

This is such a nostalgic atmosphere, the air is full of intoxicating factors.

When the sunlight penetrated the curtain and came to the desk, I recovered from the stack of manuscript paper, the familiar feeling disappeared from behind, a sorrowful mood rose from the bottom of my heart, and it told me that my fantasy was over Too. I scanned a copy of the manuscript paper and it was full of words, but I did n’t know what was written and did n’t want to pursue it. For a long while, I followed an empty thought, starting from the top manuscript paper, tearing them one by one, throwing them into an aluminum trash bin, using a lighter to light the ash, and then packing up the original script And information.

Today, Dr. Ander has another instruction on the production of the script, and I also need a routine physical examination. There is nothing to say about Dr. Ande, and I don't expect to get more information about "the psychological hint of the script" from his mouth, because according to him, that is not my business. As for the physical examination, I don't want anyone to know that I can stand up. For this reason, I deliberately re-entered the wheelchair, but I don't think it will be able to deceive for how long.

Before breakfast, I came to the next room.

As usual, the door of the room is closed, but in fact there is no anti-lock, it can be opened by twisting the door handle. Three girls in this world, Miyake, Bajing and Marceau live here. Since the old dormitory was destroyed by patients with doomsday syndrome, we moved into this temporary staff dormitory. Most of the patients in the original dormitory were either killed by security personnel on the spot after the riot, or were taken away without sound. Few lived in the new dormitory and appeared empty. Today, only three girls live in the room on the first floor.

Grabbing the door handle, I feel like I haven't visited these three girls for a century. Because my physical and mental condition is getting worse, I have not set foot in this room since last week.

I pushed open the door, and the three girls gathered in the hall, as I had imagined, and sat quietly around a round table. The table was full of cards, the kind they used to play in the old dorms. Every time I saw it, it was a miracle. The original playing cards had been turned into ashes in the fire, but now they made a new one with their memories. Of course, I can't guarantee the same as the original, but I subconsciously feel the same. They do this every day, although the production speed is not fast, but as of today, I feel that these cards are going to be finished.

To be honest, I cannot understand why they are so obsessed with these weird playing cards, but what they are obsessed with will be completed immediately, still make me happy for them, and feel that the completion of this matter will bring some Some changes ~ lightnovelpub.net ~ I remembered that there was also a card in my clothes pocket. The style and the three girls' cards were one set. It was something I found in the grave of a deceased girl in the past. I do n’t know what that girl has to do with these three girls. Obviously, that girl is not Dorothy, but this does not prevent me from using this card To these three girls.

When I put the card on the table, the three girls didn't stop their movements a little. They ignored them and continued to do their own thing. Instead, the door of the room was knocked by someone outside.

Out of a certain intuition, I keenly felt that the people outside were not the staff of the hospital. Even this intuition told me that the people outside were not here to find these three girls.

I opened the door without much hesitation, and the man in the cap outside didn't surprise me.

"Hey, man, it's been a long time." He blinked playfully and said, "Why don't I think you are surprised at all?"

It's Dallas, it's a coincidence.

! @ #