He Yu stood there blankly.

He felt that he must have heard it wrong.

"What did you say?"

“…”

But before Xie Qingcheng could speak, He Yu interrupted him immediately, and then stammered as if to escape something, "No no no...you, wait a moment..."

"Chuanbei Sydney is still stewing in the pot, I'll get it for you...I..."

It's as if a cup of Chuanbei Sydney can change everything.

The boy turned around and wanted to run to the kitchen, as if it was his shell, so he would not be stabbed by any sharp weapon when he escaped.

But Xie Qingcheng's voice came, freezing his footsteps.

"No need, He Yu."

“…”

"It's time for me to go back."

Xie Qingcheng and He Yu slept many times, and woke up many times, turning their faces and ignoring them.

Only this time, when he punished He Yu, he also severely hurt himself.

.

But He Yu couldn't see it.

After hearing Xie Qingcheng's resolute words, he couldn't hold back his tears, and now his face is full of tears, and he dare not look back.

He felt that Xie Qingcheng was bullying him again.

Every time Xie Qingcheng used him, he didn't want him and said anything cruel.

It was not difficult to enter, easy to digest, and then he held it to the man nervously.

But Xie Qingcheng said that it was over.

He will never like him.

He Yu turned his back to Xie Qingcheng and opened his mouth. The first time, he couldn't make a sound. It was not until the second time that he found his voice.

Very hoarse.

"...you, you eat...the pear first, we're talking about this, okay?"

“…”

He Yu choked up: "You eat a little...you eat a little... okay?...I've been learning for a long time..."

I have been learning for a long time.

I didn't know how to do housework or peel fruit, and I didn't know how to stew Sydney pear with rock sugar Sichuan shellfish.

I would never have loved anyone so humbly.

Not so dedicated to taking care of a person.

Now I can.

I have been learning for a long time, Xie Qingcheng.

Just take a bite.

Just look at me.

But he didn't care at the time, he just thought that when Xie Qingcheng woke up, he could bring him a bowl of steaming pear paste.

But Xie Qingcheng woke up, Xie Qingcheng said that he didn't want him.

He Yu's tears kept falling. He cried so sadly, but he kept his voice down. No matter how he refused to let Xie Qingcheng hear it, he didn't want to turn back and let Xie Qingcheng see it.

He finally walked into the kitchen with his head down and slammed the door.

On the countertop of the kitchen, there are also sugar, Sydney pieces, and a knife for cutting fruit.

He Yu packed up those things little by little, and shed tears silently while collecting them.

In fact, this apartment has never had a fire since he got the key. He used to come to live by himself, but he was too lazy to cook. He either went out to eat, or let the hotel chef prepare it and bring it to his house.

This is the first time he has opened fire here for one person, turning an "apartment" into a "home".

I didn't expect it to end like this.

He Yu suppressed his crying, stood in the kitchen for a long time, tried his best to calm down, and finally washed his face again, so that Xie Qingcheng could not see that he had shed tears.

After an unknown amount of time, the kitchen door was pushed open.

Xie Qingcheng was standing outside the door and had already changed his clothes. He said to him, "He Yu."

“…”

"I didn't make this decision because I didn't think there was anything wrong with you."

“…”

"And because of myself. I really can't take a man's liking."

He Yu lowered her eyes and stood helplessly by the sink: "...gender...is that important to you?"

He looked up.

Xie Qingcheng knew at the first moment that this child...had cried.

The eyes were moist and red, just looking at him.

"Xie Qingcheng, are these important?"

“…”

"More important than sincerity, isn't it?"

Xie Qingcheng was unable to answer.

What can he say? He can't always say, I'm sorry, He Yu, I don't think you are a man, in fact, it's because I don't live long, and I find that I can't change your feelings for me at all, so I have to do it, I hope you Don't waste your youth on me.

He Yu was quiet for a while, watching the small flames of pear soup rolling on the stove.

He has been enduring it all the time, and suddenly he can't bear it anymore.

He looked back at Xie Qingcheng, and his voice trembled slightly because of his sadness: "Do you know Xie Qingcheng? You can't find a second person in this world who loves you like me. ."

Xie Qingcheng looked at him for a long time, at this moment he wanted to stretch out his arms to comfort this clumsy, embarrassed, humble but proud young dragon.

His feelings for He Yu, from the initial shock, to the later doubts, from the later doubts, to the current heartbreak.

When Xie Qingcheng and Li Rouqiu divorced, he said that he had never seen them before, and he would not believe in that kind of love that flies into the flames and ignores them.

He Yu let him see.

The more clearly he sees this love, the more his heart hurts. He Yu was like a puppy he accidentally saw on the road. Because he felt so pitiful, he threw some food for him. He originally just wanted to maintain such a simple relationship, and never thought about adopting this puppy or establishing any unnecessary closeness with it.

But the puppy doesn't think so.

It waits for him in that position every day, and when it sees him, it will happily run over and rub around his legs, it has been tamed by him unintentionally - but he knows In the near future, he will not take this road, nor will he wait for the person passing by.

He doesn't feed it any food, or even pretends he can't see it, what choice does he have?

However, the puppy didn't know, the puppy whimpered and chased after him, didn't understand why he suddenly ignored it, was it too dirty? Or too ugly? Or because it's a little sick dog? So he will always just feed it a few mouthfuls of food, but he is unwilling to hold it, nor can he like it.

Xie Qingcheng finally lowered his hand.

He didn't give He Yu that hug.

He said, "I know I can't meet someone who likes me like you do."

He Yu opened his eyes slightly, and there was some vague hope in them.

Xie Qingcheng did not deny his feelings.

Having experienced the separation at the age of fourteen, Xie Qingcheng knew that he should not deny any of He Yu's sincerity. This is the last respect and protection he can give He Yu.

"He Yu, I am thirty-three years old. I have been married and divorced. I have kissed many times and met countless people." Xie Qingcheng leaned against the warm stove Bian, weakly, quietly, almost gently, told He Yu what really came from his heart, "Actually, my condition is not very good, I am old, my health is not good, I don't understand the style, and I still have a job. I'm busy, and I can't give others much satisfaction materially. I have self-knowledge."

He Yu's tears were about to fall again, he shook his head.

Xie Qingcheng is a person who almost never underestimates himself.

He is confident and strong.

But at this moment, Xie Qingcheng was in front of him, almost sighing and showing his shabby one by one, the kind of look at him soberly and calmly admitting how bad he was, unexpectedly It was more painful than Xie Qingcheng rejecting him.

He Yu choked: "No..."

"What I said is the truth." Xie Qingcheng was very calm, facing a person who treats him with such sincerity, he can also show him his embarrassment, "Actually, I know that for a person like me, the most suitable ending is to end up alone - I know that I am good looking and will attract some girls' liking, but liking and love are different, and love and true feelings are different Yes. After Li Rouqiu and I divorced, I had given up and thought that I would never get a true love."

"But you gave me your affection."

"He Yu, I'm sorry, I didn't believe you really liked me from the beginning. Because you are so young and a boy, I think you are mistaken My own feelings, I even want to guide you and make you admit that it is just a dependence." Xie Qingcheng paused, coughed lightly, and then continued, "I know I broke your heart."

"Thank you..."

"You listen to me and finish." Xie Qing's lips were pale, and at the moment, they were even more morbidly white, "...I know you are the best, and you are the best for me. You almost want to dig out your heart and show it to me, so that I can understand your intentions."

"I have seen it all now. He Yu. I have understood it all."

He is really aggrieved.

The feeling of being constantly denied, suppressed, misunderstood, and finally recognized one day, as long as anyone who has experienced it, may be able to understand the bitterness and bitterness that came to their hearts at that moment.

"It's my fault. I'm too self-righteous. I think I'm older than you and know more than you. It's because I don't respect your feelings."

He Yu had red almond eyes and whispered, "Brother Xie..."

Xie Qingcheng: "He Yu, I have never met anyone before, who liked me as much as you. I know that I will never meet someone who likes you as much. Me. You have given me so many irreplaceable memories and feelings."

“…”

"I appreciate you."

“…”

"Really."

Xie Qingcheng said this and sighed softly.

He closed his eyes, his Adam's apple rolled.

The apology that should be apologized, the acknowledgement that should be given, he finally congratulated him.

The rest is cruelty that must be spoken.

He expressed all the warmth in his heart, his chest was about to block the city with ice... He slowly opened his eyes and said to He Yu: "But I still can't accept you. I can not do it."

He Yu: "You, why are you..."

"Because I feel ashamed, I feel so guilty when I'm with you, I feel like all these things I did, all the things we did last night...were...so immoral, so disrespectful It's counterintuitive. It shouldn't happen." Xie Qingcheng forced himself to say these words, "...Can you think about what you were doing when I was twenty? I was twenty, and you were only seven. The first time I saw you, you were so young, you were just a kid. When I was in high school, you were just born... The more I think about it, the more ridiculous it gets... We'll be the laughing stock of others together. ,do you understand?"

He Yu looked at him with red eyes and shook his head: "I don't understand."

“…”

"Why are we together, you have to care about others? I can care about everything, and I don't care what others say about me."

"He Yu...you shouldn't be tortured like that, the feeling of being constantly talked about is very painful, you can't..."

"I'm not afraid." He Yu said, "and you have been suffering from those things all the time. From the moment you left the hospital, you are suffering from this kind of torture. Why can't I bear?"

“…”

"I know that you are afraid that I will suffer the same injury, that others will laugh at the men of my uncles... But I don't care about them at all! I don't care what other people say about me, Because I know I'm not! I just love someone, no matter how others criticize me, I won't change."

The boy's expression is very stubborn and his eyes are so stubborn.

"I don't care about them, I don't care about their eyes and their mouths, Xie Qingcheng, I don't care about anyone in this world, except you."

“…”

closure.

Xie Qingcheng felt even more uncomfortable.

I am in hell, will you come too?

He closed his eyes and said, "But I care."

He Yu: "…"

"I can't stand being with my sister's students."

He Yu refused to give up, and said like a madman: "If you definitely care, then I can drop out of school."

"...it's useless for you to drop out. I can't stand being with a boy thirteen years younger than me."

"Then I can find a way to change my ID."

"I can't stand being with your dad - with He Jiwei's son."

He Yu became more and more anxious: "Then I-then I-"

Xie Qingcheng raised his hand and gently touched He Yu's head. He didn't let He Yu say the second half of the sentence, Xie Qingcheng knew that every sentence he said seemed crazy, but it was true. He said to He Yu, "I understand all your sincerity, but... I'm sorry."

“…”

"This is my final decision."

Xie Qingcheng felt that he couldn't face He Yu like this, he put his hands down and wanted to say something, but he didn't say anything after all, he turned around and left...

In this moment.

He Yu chased after him and hugged him from behind.

"Thank you..."

“…”

"Dr. Xie..."

“…”

"Xie Qingcheng...!"

"Are you leaving again..." He Yu's voice was clearly choked, "Are you leaving me again...?!"

It was a cloudy day, and the light seemed so dim that it poured in through the heavy window glass, and there was no warmth at all. The silver-like light that was like frost lightly outlined the sides of He Yu and Xie Qingcheng's figures. It was as fragile as the dew on the branches in early spring, and it melted at the touch of a fingertip.

A cup of sweet pear soup cooked clumsily is all hot.

His heart couldn't condense in such a temperature, it was like an ocean, and it actually blurred his own vision.

"Don't want me, okay, Xie Qingcheng... You don't want me..."

“…”

"I can't love anyone else anymore, I've already given you my heart, don't go...Xie Qingcheng..."

"You don't go..."

Xie Qingcheng wanted to turn around and hug him more than ever.

But he knows better than ever that if he hugs him today, everything will never be turned back, then when his organs fail and he dies, He Yu will suffer more More pain now.

The little milk dog on the side of the road was chasing the human being, I didn't understand why the human being didn't look at him, why didn't he stop, it hurt the heart, and the whimper also drilled into the human heart deep.

It hurts.

It hurts.

Tears fell on the ground, He Yu never noticed.

Xie Qingcheng didn't say anything, he raised his cool hand and gently patted He Yu's hand around his waist. And then—he still broke away from his warmth, pushed out the door, and walked towards the frosty road.

There is no turning back.